A couple of weeks ago I tested positive for covid. Thankfully, minus a couple of really not great days, my symptoms were overall mild and manageable. However, I found the fatigue that lingered for days and days after “recovering” was more mentally and emotionally draining than I could have expected.
I would try to do small chores around the house or even dress one of my kids and would be completely wiped out halfway through. Being extremely fatigued and not able to complete simple tasks is of course frustrating, but I knew something deeper was happening. One day I finally couldn’t take it anymore, and I sat down and asked the Father what was really going on in my heart.
He revealed to me that a big part of the problem was that I was finding my worth and identity in what I could produce as a wife and a mother…like if I couldn’t sweep the floors and wash the dishes, or couldn’t keep the house in order or dress my kids and put them to bed, I was useless.
I couldn’t seem to get past that part of my revelation until I brought it up to two dear friends here in The Garden. I am so thankful to have learned to importance of doing life in community! My friends reminded me that those were dirty lies being told to me by the enemy, and they encouraged and helped me walk out the rest of the kairos circle. While walking out the rest of the kairos circle, I realized that above being a wife and a mother, I am a daughter of the Heavenly Father. I don’t have to DO anything to be what/who I am, I just get to be.
My identity as a daughter doesn’t depend on what I can produce so therefore my identity as a mom and a wife shouldn’t either.
I want to remind you today, that nothing you do or don’t do will change the way Father feels about you. You have a deep, rooted identity in Him and nothing can change that. He wants to be a safe place to rest— a place where we can come and rest in Him exactly as we are and it doesn’t budge our identity in Him.
-Whitney W.