Most of the people in my life that I am close to have stronger personalities. Though I am generally laid back, I tend to gravitate to stronger, take-charge individuals. I often notice others being more driven or seemingly more successful in their roles than I am. It can seem like other women are better wives to their husbands, moms to their kids, friends to their friends. I’ve even felt lately as if some of the women in my neighborhood are better neighbors than I am. Even when I’m not aware of it, I’m comparing myself to others.
I think to myself, “I don’t plan as well. I’m not as decisive. Or as passionate. Or as motivated. Or as efficient.” And the list goes on and on…
These thoughts have led to my frustration, apathy and a lack of confidence and joy in who I am. I have been in this place many times and the Father always gently pulls me out. But this time, I don’t want to fall back into the thinking that who I am isn’t as good or as valuable as others.
Psalm 139 says, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.” If I keep returning to these thoughts, my soul doesn’t “know it very well”, does it?
So how do I get my soul to know this truth very well? I have to look at Jesus. I have to see myself seated with Him. I have to stop looking at others and comparing. I have to stop looking to myself to fill roles I wasn’t designed to or in ways that I wasn’t meant to. How could someone who is one with Jesus have such insecurities?! Ephesians 2 goes on to say “He raised us up with Christ the exalted One, and we ascended with him into the glorious perfection and authority of the heavenly realm, for we are now co-seated as one with Christ!” and “…we will be the visible display of the infinite riches of his grace and kindness, which was showered upon us in Jesus Christ.”
I have to allow Him to continuously shower me in the infinite riches of His grace and kindness. I have to see myself raised up and seated with Him and one with Him. Then I will feel the freedom to be the unique individual I have been created to be whether or not others see the value in my differences.
I am the masterpiece of the Creator. He formed my inward parts and I am wonderfully made. He created me for very special work. I have inherent value because I am loved by God. And so are you!